THE BAADER-MEINHOF PHENOMENON
Excerpts from incomplete fanfiction based on characters from Captain America
“It’s going to be okay,” Steve says to Bucky, but it settles wrong in his chest, makes it hard to breath and for the first time since the collapsed feeling in his heart when he saw Bucky fall into the ravine, Steve wonders if the serum stopped working, if his lungs were regressing. His hand twitches, a subconscious response that never went away, no matter how long it’s been since he’s actually needed his atomizer. He swallows hard, unable to stop looking at Bucky, taking in the stormy grey of his eyes, the way they had softened now, slowly returning back to the open and happy expressions that his Buck always wore.
Bucky’s laugh was wet and short and oh god, did it hurt to hear. He can hear the echo of it in his ears, one from decades ago, after Bucky’s conscription, when Bucky wore his service uniform and told Steve the same: It’s going to be okay. But it wasn’t; they knew it wouldn’t be. Steve gave him the same wet laugh, willed back the tears for the sake of his best friend and kept all the admissions safe under his tongue. Instead, he watched the back of the one person who raised the sun and hung the moon as he walked away, Steve found himself hating that green color, never wanting to see it ever again-- his newest anathema. Steve didn’t escort Bucky to the station. Bucky said it was better for Steve to say home, that the smoke ain’t good for your lungs, punk and what are you going to do when I’m not here to make sure you don’t get into trouble or do something stupid. So, Steve stayed behind, just as he always did, but this time he was completely alone, no loud-mouthed James Buchanan to keep him company. The door shut behind the final flash of that green and Steve was alone for the first time in many, many years.
He got roaring drunk that night, determined to forget it all.
He didn’t.
He saw that olive green everywhere after that day-- the curse of the Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon-- and it hurt just as bad each time.
